I felt mint!
Conclusion: Iron Maiden are MINT!
METAAAAAAAAAAL!!!!!!!!!!
The long version:
After my problems at the Gary Numan and Motorhead gigs, I decided to drink a 750ml bottle of water on the train to Sheffield, in the interest of preventing dehydration and hallucination. When I arrived, I was going to get the tram to the arena, but the other Maidenheads on the train decided taxis would be more convenient and just as cheap, so I joined them. We arrived an hour and a half before doors opened, and I couldn't see anything in the way of queues, so we went into a pub across the road from the arena, which was, of course, full of Maidenheads and the powers that be responded by playing Maiden over the sound system.
Despite all the water I'd drunk on the train, I found myself really thirsty, so I drank a 250ml bottle of water - and was still thirsty. Then I remembered that mineral water always dehydrates me - when I was working at my parents' shop over the summer, once I started going to the water cooler, I couldn't stop. Whoops.
Inside the venue, the closest I could get to the front was five rows back (right in the middle!) Now I know, from many a time in the front row, that next few tend to be quite pushy, but since Maiden are anti-mosh and the videos I've seen of them show the audience looking quite static, I thought I'd be all right.
While I waited for the support band, they played three Arch Enemy tracks over the sound system and then some industrialish stuff. Yay!
The support band was Funeral For A Friend. I know Maiden chose them because they wanted a current band who liked Maiden, but gah. As far as I'm concerned, you can do one of two things as far as support bands goes: pick someone well-known and similar in style (as Alice Cooper did with Dio and Suede did with Mansun), or pick someone mostly unknown and maybe a bit different, in the hope of Introducing The Audience To A Style Of Music They May Not Have Listened To Before: Some Will Dislike It, Most Will Think It's Ok, And Some Will Approve. The problem with FFAF was, they were well-known enough for most of the audience to know something of them, but quite different from Maiden.
For a start, they're not metal. Their website describes them as emo / rock / hardcore, but I'd describe it as "like yearny indie-of-year-2000 [the dead year, when all the Britpop bands had gone weird or pants, but before twee-ness had made much of an impact on Britain and prior to the The band explosion] with a strong hint of that stoned British punk/metal 3 Colours Red sound, and some GRARRRRRH! bits". (I know that probably doesn't help you "picture" their sound at all, if you don't know it, but it's the best I can do!)
Now I have fairly wide taste in alternative music, compared to a lot of people. I like every style of metal other than rap-metal, I'm a part-time goth / industrialoid, and I like punk and indie. So of course I've no objection to yearniness, I love 3 Colours Red, and I don't mind a bit of GRARRRRRHing. But FFAF don't really appeal to me, on account of their unusual rhythms - being an industrial metaller above all else, I like something rather more regular - and this really annoying tendency in emo for the vocal line to repetitively descend then jump up again, which offends my sense of musical direction (if you will). And, of course, a lot of the audience forgave less than I did. It's by no means impossible to be a metalhead and emoid simultaneously (my brother is, though doesn't like FFAF either) but it's not that likely either.
Since the yearniness dominates, I think they would have sounded really cool at a small open-air summer festival, as the sun began to set, with the audience sprawled on the grass. As it was, it didn't fit at all. Also the singer was too nice - he kept saying things like "I know you just want Maiden and I respect you all!" If he'd been like, "Ok, so you don't like us, but we don't like you either, and you've got to listen us, so shan!" I, at any rate, would have warmed to them more. Also, before the third song, he said, "This one's about orcs." Now I thought this was a clever way of saying, "Just because we don't look or sound like Warhammer metal, we are! Really!" Before the fourth he said, "This one's about goblins" and before the fifth he said, "This one's about orcs" - also very clever, since indeed, Warhammer metal bands don't ever sing about anything else. But then he kept rambling on about how much we liked orcs, and orcs, goblins and wizards are what all music's about, innit, and Manowar, and all the humour was lost. It was embarrassing. Especially when a large portion of audience started chanting "Maiden! Maiden! Maiden!" in the middle of a song. Still, kudos to FFAF for Doing What They Believe In Despite Mass Disapproval, and bah to Maiden for not getting Arch Enemy instead (though they did support elsewhere, and are probably just not doing so now as it clashes with their own tour).
Prior to Maiden, we got all the same background music again. Not complaining though.
And then there was METAAAAAAAL!!!!!!
It's a very strange feeling being simultaneously deliriously happy and convinced you have approximately two minutes left to live.
Even though it's the Dance Of Death tour, I wasn't actually expecting dancing to kill me.
I knew that if I somehow avoided having my life crushed out of me, I'd lose my glasses or wallet or both sooner or later. Never mind the letters on my velcro shirt. (If I'm seeing a famous band whose shirt I don't have, I write a lyric of theirs or something that makes a good slogan in velcro letters. For The Buzzcocks I did "Everybody's Happy Nowadays :(". For Gary Numan I did "Praying +0 The Aliens", and for Arch Enemy I'm doing "Enemy Within" and for New Model Army "I Love The World". This time, since "668: The Neighbour Of The Beast" wouldn't fit, I just settled for "Maiden" à la the "Angel", "Slut" etc t-shirts that were popular among girls my age a few years ago.)
But there was no obvious way out. I wasn't close enough to the front to catch the eye of security, but I was too far into the throng to force my way out the back or sides. And everyone was too busy being thrown back and forth and up and down to notice I could do with being helped out of there. Fortunately, during the fourth song, the bloke in front of me started forcing the sea of people apart to get his girlfriend out, and I followed. I ended up about nine rows from the stage, with a better view and able to move exactly as I liked. Excellent.
Except, after a few more songs, all the colours in my view started bleeding together, and I knew I'd best get more air. I headed back, took off my coat, felt better for a bit, but then all the band turned into fuzzy red streaks. Since I wanted to enjoy rather than endure the gig, I knew I'd best sit down. I got a really good seat, though. It didn't feel the same - it was more like watching them on video than standing before them - but I felt fine from then on.
Gah. It's not having any metal nights to go to, I tells ya. Not only did I used to be able to dance in time to "Jesus Built My Hotrod", but I could dance in time to "Pore" by OhGr immediately afterwards, and then some. Dancing to two hours straight of metal at least once a week for nineteen months, and then not going to any straightforward metal nights for five months, can't do much to help gigging ability. I'm going to have to take it easy at Arch Enemy, but I need metal nights and fast. I'm nearly through all the punk and metal bands I currently *have* to see (The Stranglers, Alice Cooper, Rammstein, The Cardiacs, The Buzzcocks, Motorhead and Maiden), but I haven't seen Nine Inch Nails yet and I hate being the stereotypical ickle wimpy female. I want my Rammstein-pit surviving ability back!
Anyway. YAY! TOTAL METAAAAAAAAL! I felt sooooo happy! Before the encore, Bruce thanked us all profusely and promised that there'd be more tours and records. My cup o happiness runnethed over and I nearly cried. Then they played "Journeyman", "The Number Of The Beast" and "Run To The Hills". I sung along and grinned like mad. They grinned back. I would have loved a second encore (the set didn't feel long enough, and you know, I would have gladly stayed there all night if they'd kept playing) but still: yay!
After buying said t-shirt, I got v. confused by the tram system, but eventually made it to chez Natalya et Kim. I first met them at UKC, but never had much chance to chat to them in person. We made up for this by staying up v. late, and this morning, put it this way: I intended to get a 10 or 11 o'clock train back to York; I ended up on a 5.21 one. So that was nice.
But alas, for I have three assignments due in tomorrow, and none of them are finished yet *and* I've had no more than six hours sleep on any night this week. (For no discernible reason: I'd go to bed tired and in good time, but I'd squidge and squirdle around for two hours.) So best get to work.
